This week’s big questions revolves around whether or not it’s safe to have sex with a pregnant woman. Also, thanks to Masters & Johnson, we find out about retarded and incompetent ejaculation. And some potential big news, Mistress M has been approached by a UK production company to appear on a TV show about sex education. More details when they are available.
Video Rating: 4 / 5

Image by Editor B via Flickr

The mistress is the major fear and torment of many wives – especially after discovering that her husband did, in fact, enjoy another’s charms. Winning him back offers an insecure thrill that is tinged with the fear he might stray again or even return to his former mistress. Even worse – what if the mistress refuses to let go?

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When Your Husband’s Mistress Won’t Back Off

By: Katie Lersch

I recently received an email from a wife who was at her wit’s end with her husband’s former mistress. The husband was insisting that he was now committed to the wife and the marriage and they were working very hard to save the marriage. However, the mistress just seemed unwilling to let the husband go. She would drive by the house, continue to call both the wife and husband and hang up, send emails, and send messages on their face book accounts.

They wanted to get rid of this woman once and for all but she didn’t seem to be getting the message. The wife wanted to my advice as to how to get the mistress to back off so that she could get her life back and get to work on saving her marriage. She just wanted to be left alone. I’ll tell you what I told her in the following article.

Telling The Mistress Very Plainly To Back Off And Then Not Responding To Her Again: It’s not always the case, but sometimes the mistress hangs on because the husband has not made himself crystal clear. Of course, he will tell the wife that he’s been very direct. But, the mistress might see things a bit differently. She may take little nuggets of what your husband is saying and turn them around so that they are saying exactly what she wants him to say.

In this case, it’s best to make sure that the husband is very clear in one last message. I often advise that the wife listens in on the phone call, which should be very short. Basically, I felt that the husband should pick up the next time the mistress called and tell her that she was not to contact, follow, drive by, or attempt to engage either him or his wife. If the mistress tried to interrupt, the husband was just to respond that if she continued on, they would have to take legal action and that this was the last time the two of them would communicate. The husband was then to hang up and to not engage with her no matter what.

Once The Message Has Been Delivered, Refuse To Engage With The Mistress: Sometimes, this firm message won’t be enough to get the mistress to back off. She will often try to test this to see if the husband really meant what he said. But here’s the thing, the more you engage with her and the more she makes you angry and frustrated, the more she thinks that she has won. Her whole goal is to make you and your husband place your focus on her rather than each other. Do not let her do this.

Block her number and her texts on your phone. Block her email. Tell your provider that she is spam. Ignore her completely if you can. Pretend that she doesn’t exist. Every time you respond to her and engage her, she just makes this process go on for much longer than it should. Eventually, she will get the message that you have moved on and that you have left no place for her in your life. She will usually eventually turn her attention elsewhere since she is no longer getting the pay off that she feeds off of.

Leave Any Actions That Are Necessary To The Professionals: Never fight with the mistress. Never allow her to bait you into an altercation. I’ve had readers who have had no choice but to send the mistress a certified letter and to tell her that if she continues on, they will get a restraining order. (You want this in writing so you have a paper trail that you have done nothing wrong and have tried to address this.)

Whatever you do, don’t stoop down to her level. Don’t let her win. If she just will not stop, you may have to involve the authorities. That is their job. Let them do it. But, the more that you allow for her to carry on like this, the more she feeds on the process. Her greatest fear is that the two of you move on together and have no place for her in your life anymore. Her “not backing off” is her attempt to weasel her way back in.

But you have control over how you react to her. The best course of action is often to make your position (and your husband’s) crystal clear and then to pull out of the game knowing that she will eventually get the message. If she doesn’t, then leave this to the professionals. Do not try to deal with her yourself. The less you allow her into your life, the better off you are.

I know that even contemplating your husband’s mistress is painful and difficult, but make sure that you don’t give her more power than she deserves. And, healing is often closer than you may think. It took a lot of work and patience, but today my marriage is actually stronger than it ever was before. I also did a lot of work on myself and am happier as the result. Our bond and intimacy is much stronger and my self esteem is at an all time high. I no longer worry my husband will cheat again. You can read a very personal story on my blog at http://surviving-the-affair.com/

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Image by George Eastman House via Flickr

Many women fear the arrival of a mistress n their lives as a strong possibility that the other woman could bring about the end of the marriage. This fear itself is capable of undermining the relationship and transferring more power to the mistress.

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The Mistress – A Woman of Power

By:  Trudy-Ann Ewan

The mistress is more than the woman on the side. She is not the booty call, the girlfriend, the side-piece and contrary to popular notion, she really is not the other woman. The Mistress is vertically on the same level as the Wife or even higher.

The Mistress tends to be very well-educated, doesn’t take crap from anyone and she can hold her own in society. She is financial secure, and doesn’t really need to be supported by any man. She is involved with a married man because of numerous reasons known only to her.

The wife naturally is the one who is married to the man. She may or may not know about the Mistress. An intuitive wife will know what she needs to know and then decide how to use that information. There are some wives that allow their husbands to have a Mistress. This is not because of low self-esteem or a lame attempt to keep the husband happy.

Instead, if the wife is busy in her life and is not able to be there for her husband at all times, she will allow him to be with his Mistress. The Mistress in this situation would relieve the wife of any burdens from her husband. There have been occasions where the wife and the mistress have become friends. But it takes highly mature individuals to get to that level.

Now in a bizarre twist, the mistress could very well be more of a wife to the man than his actual wife. This is where the power comes in. If the wife is not very educated and she is not running her own business, she will not be on par with the Mistress.

This is more proven when the wife begins to act and behave like the mistress. Clearly the Mistress now has more power than the wife. There is a chance that she may not know that a particular woman is the Mistress, but she may hear her husband talking about a particular woman constantly and because she doesn’t have her own identity she will find ways to find out more about this woman and then begin to imitate her ways.

This will be a lame attempt to be more attractive to her husband. When the wife begins to behave like that she has given up her power as the Wife and transference of power to the Mistress occurs. The Mistress now becomes the Wife-elect.

Any mistress can feel when the transference of power to her occurs. The husband is talking to her more. He is helping her more with her stuff and he finds more time to spend with her. He will not walk away from her because she offers some excitement to his life. It can be asked why he doesn’t leave his wife.

Well, there could be many reasons. He may have children with the wife and he doesn’t want to leave his children, or he’s not a hundred percent sure of where he really wants to be. He may be fighting within himself regarding the need to be really happy. If he finds his time with the Mistress enhances his relationship with his wife, then he is still wrestling with what he really wants and where he really wants to be.

He may be feeling guilty about leaving the wife because she is innocent to an extent, but when the wife begins to act like the Mistress, then the Mistress has the power. Even if she never gets to marry the man, knowing that the wife is trying to be like her and that the husband prefers to spend time with her than with the wife, then the Mistress has all the power she needs.

She knows she has it in her power to turn the wife’s world upside down just by continuing to be her. The Mistress has her own identity and if she is not trying to imitate the wife, although the wife is trying to imitate her, then she is the one with all the Power.

You may be wondering will that man ever leave his wife to go and be with his Mistress and if he does, will he be faithful to her. Well, yes, men have left their wives to be with their Mistresses who they really love. Will he be faithful? Well that depends on what faithful means to those two individuals? There are some women that are very confident in themselves and are not threatened by other women, so they will allow their husband certain privileges when it comes to the opposite sex.

I know of a woman who tells her man that if he finds a hot woman who he wants to have sex with, wear a condom and then call her with the details. There is no reason to cheat because he already has certain privileges and also they have a very strong relationship, which was not built on sex and that has a very solid foundation. That makes their relationship transparent.

Have you figured out who has the most power as yet? Well, it’s the woman who does not have to change her identity to match the other woman in order to capture the man’s attention. She can hold her own and is not defined by the relationship that she is having. She does not judge herself and she has a lot of confidence. Overall, a Mistress always has more power and influence.

Trudy-Ann Ewan is a Relationship Expert, who tell it like it is. She believes that as Adults we are going to have Adult experiences, so therefore, not have judgments about our life. Sign up for the free Create Your Passion Newsletter at: http://www.createyourpassion.com/FREE-Newsletter.html and where you can also join her coaching program. You can join her on Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/createyourpassion

One of Tiger’s chicks; Jamie Grubbs released a very damaging voicemail. There is no way she’s ever going to be a successful actress or model after this. She’s and idiot! Would you have done it?! FIND SKYY JOHN: MY OTHER CHANNEL www.youtube.com FACEBOOK www.facebook.com TWITTER www.twitter.com SKYY JOHN T-SHIRTS SkyyJohn.spreadshirt.com EMAIL: Skyy44@Gmail.com

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Image by gmayster01 via Flickr

A captivating look at the life of the mistress as portrayed in fiction. In this collection of 3 vignettes, the lives of three couples caught up in love relationships are tantalizingly explored.

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Book Review for: “The Mistress’ House”

Reviewed by: S. Burkhart

Written By: Leigh Michaels
Sourcebooks Casablanca
ISBN: 978-1-4022-4135-2
311 pages/print book
$7.99
4.5 Stars

Michaels pens a captivating read with “The Mistress’ House.” Set in historical England during the hey day of the ton, the novel revolves around three couples who are equally ensnared and enthralled by the power of love.

What I found intriguing was Michaels use of the Number Five Upper Seymour Street. The House is quiet and unassuming, yet behind its doors many passions are unleashed, equal to that of turbulent waves crashing on a sandy shore.

In the first vignette, Lord Hawthorne (Thorne) buys Number Five Upper Seymour Street on the recommendation of his butler, Perkins. Thorne is adamant about retaining his bachelorhood. Enter Lady Anne Keighley. She accepts Thorne for what he is and asks that he ruin her anyway. The request is maddening to Thorne, but he agrees to fulfill it. Anne is not only beautiful, but enchanting. Will their nights of passion give way to love?

Once Anne no longer needs Number Five Upper Seymour Street, she invites her childhood friend, Felicity Mercer to stay in the house. Felicity agrees. Soon she meets Lord Richard Colford. Richard is the brother of her deceased lover, Roger, and Felicity has a bold request for Richard: give her a child. Richard finds Felicity a challenge and vows to brand her as his own. Felicity doesn’t want to fall in love, but will Richard’s lovemaking prove her undoing?

When Felicity leave the mistress’ house, it almost immediately receives another occupant – Thorne’s ward, Miss Georgina Baxter, an heiress who her uncle arranges a marriage for. Georgina does not want the arranged marriage. Enter Thorne’s cousin, Julian Hampton. The dashing army officer is returning from war to claim his inheritance. After meeting Georgina, she asks him to teach her the ways of love. Julian is all too willing to oblige the beautiful young lady, but when they are caught, will they be forced into a loveless marriage?

Michael’s writing is sharp, capturing the feel and authenticity of historical London. Her descriptions easily transport the reader to another time and place. The dialogue was crisp and engaging. I chuckled when Anne told Thorne to ruin her.

The characterization is the richest part of the novel. Each heroine has their reasons for what motivates them. Each hero is set in his ways and is deliciously undone by the circumstances they find themselves in.

The novel is intense for romance readers. Michaels’ loves scenes are tasteful and sensual. She excels at sexual tension. Michaels had me as soon as Anne told Thorne to ruin her. I simply did not want to put this book down.

“The Mistress’ House” is a page-turner!

Reviewed by: S. Burkhart

StephB is an author who likes to read many books and a variety of different genres. StephB is an author at http://www.Writing.Com/ which is a site for Creative Writing.

Question by Sweetface: Seriously, is a woman a Mistress if Married Man is separated and 2yr relationship with OW is not a secret?
Estranged Wife, friends, family, co workers everyone knows of married mans relationship with ow and life goes on as it should. Is women still a mistress although she is not a secret just because man is not divorced?

Best answer:

Answer by Jason B
Yes.

Just like a killer is still a killer even if he haven’t killed in 50 years.

Only after a divorce is she not a mistress.

Give your answer to this question below!

by PKMousie

Should You Seek Or Get Revenge On Your Husband’s Mistress? Is It Even Worth It?

It’s perfectly normal to fixate on the other woman or mistress when finding out about a husband’s cheating. Of course you want to know who she is, what she looks like, how she got her hooks into your husband, and what her intentions are with this whole sorted thing. These feelings are normal.

I can’t tell you how many emails I get from wives who are plotting and planning elaborate revenge plots against the other person. Wives feel that getting this revenge will make them feel better and will at least allow them some satisfaction in exchange for their pain. However, some do intuitively sense that opening up this can or worms can do more harm than good. Yesterday, I got an email from a woman who asked “is it really worth it to get revenge on her? Will it help me or just make me feel worse?” I’ll answer this question in the following article.

Understanding What You Really Want (And Hope To Gain) By Confronting The Mistress: Often, when I ask wives what they hope to gain by facing down the other woman, I get a variety of responses like: “I want her to know that I know exactly what she’s up to and I’m not going to stand for it,” or “I want to feel her out and see just who she is and what he might see in her,” or “I want her to know that their will be serious consequences if she keeps this up,” (to threaten her) or “I want her to realize what she’s done to our family.”

All of these things assume though that she’s going to be rational, receptive, and that she’ll actually listen to what you’re saying. Her past behavior indicates that this isn’t likely. She’s already shown herself to be dishonest, unintelligent, and lacking in impulse control, so it’s unlikely that you’re going to get any satisfaction dealing with someone like this.

I know from experience that what most women are looking for by seeking revenge is something to make them feel better. They are looking for some relief from the pain and some sense of control over the situation. But, truly, there are healthier ways to achieve this that don’t force you to allow this woman into your life any more than she already is.

You Have More Control Than You Think: You Don’t Need To Obtain This From Her: As I’ve said, most women will look for revenge on the mistress to regain a sense of control. But often, the opposite occurs. Often, the other woman is hurtful and spiteful and is all too happy to tell you things that will hurt you and she then will often come after your husband and your family to extract her own personal revenge. In essence, you’re only prolonging this unfortunate cycle for much longer than you have to.

To feel better and heal from the affair (which I believe is the true goal) you will need to start focusing on creating positive experiences and a sense of control. You can give these things to yourself, whether you want to save your marriage or not. It’s important for you to understand that this is not your fault. It is the fault of two people over whom you had no control. No matter what was lacking in your marriage, there were other options available. But, your husband chose the most undesirable option and he will need to take responsibility for this.

Instead of confronting her and allowing more of this negativity into your life, protect yourself from things that weaken and hurt you and only allow in things that strengthen and heal you. Be kind to yourself. Define what you need and make sure that you get it. Take your power back. Surround yourself with the people who care and the things that make you happy.

If You Want To Save Your Marriage, Letting This Woman Into Your Life Will Only Make Things Worse: If you chose to try to rescue your marriage, you really should cease all contact with this woman – that includes both you and your husband. And, if you want answers and reassurances, you should seek them from your husband, not from her. If you’re seeking a release of the tension and want to feel better, seek this from people that you trust and who have your best interests at heart. She does not fit that bill.

And, if you do chose to save your marriage, you should put your efforts into doing the work necessary to reestablish the trust and intimacy. This will take a lot of your attention and time. You should be focused on your husband and creating positive experiences on which to rebuild. These things do not happen over night. It may be a while until you are ready for this. But, when you are, allowing this woman into your life is a step backward. Don’t give her more power and presence than she deserves.

At the end of the day, the best revenge on her is your own happiness. Her best case scenario is to take away what you have – and to have it for herself. So, your objective is to banish her from your life immediately. Insist that your husband stay away from her and vow to do the same.

I receive so many letters from wives concerned about revenge and I can tell you that it almost never turns out as you expect to and more often than not, it just makes you feel worse, not better.

Confronting or talking to the woman that your husband cheated with is probably only one of the issues you are dealing with. I know that working through this is difficult, but it can truly be worth it. Although I never would’ve believed this two years ago, I did eventually truly get over the affair. My marriage is stronger than ever. It took a lot of work, and I had to play the game to win, but it was worth it. Our bond and intimacy is much stronger and because of all the work I did on myself, my self esteem is at an all time high. I know longer worry my husband will cheat again. You can read a very personal story on my blog at http://surviving-the-affair.com/

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