How to end an unhealthy relationship when you still have feelings?

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I seriously need help. It’s been 2 years and the relationship took a turn for the worse. Everything seems forced now. I’m distracted and it’s killing my relationships with my friends and family. He doesn’t want to try anymore but I still have feelings.

10 Important Tips For A Healthy Love Relationship

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All couples experience problems and challenges in their relationships.
These helpful tips are necessary and should be applied so as to help build a healthy love relationship and prepare for the challenges along the way.

The following tips may assist you with enhancing the love relationships in your life;

1. Create Special Time – to connect with your spouse or partner, to share thoughts of appreciation through words, actions or deeds.

2. Listening – can be a wonderful gift to your loved one – don’t forget to be attentive and present when interacting with that special person.

3. Schedule Date Night – each week, so that you and your special love have uninterrupted time to stay connected. You can have a date on the town or at home.

4. Take Responsibility – for your feelings and actions by speaking in “I” terms, don’t play the blame game.

5. When you are angry – take a Time Out such as a deep breath, counting to ten or taking a walk. These strategies will help you avoid hurting each other emotionally through
harsh words or physically through hitting, punching or shoving. Many couples face the risks and pains of intimate partner violence.

6. Communicate – your love, concerns and feelings on a regular basis. You can do this during the day through a special two minute phone call, by taking a walk in the evening, watching the sunrise or sunset, or leaving a love note in a special place.

7. Find a hobby – that you can share together. Many people enjoy cooking, gardening, walking, jogging, reading, playing board games, etc.

8. Attend to each other’s – needs for intimacy and connection. Find ways to remember your days of early dating, and give your spouse or partner that special positive energy.

9. It takes two - to tango, so be willing to lead and follow.

10. Remember to -incorporate three important phrases in your daily interactions:
“I’m sorry”, “thank you” and “I love you.”

A healthy love relationship doesn’t just happen – you have to work at it. Relationships do change (and they definitely will) and when they do you need to be aware of how they are changing and adapt to those changes.

Did you find those tips on healthy relationships useful? You can learn a lot more about how these tips can help you enjoy lasting and healthy relationships here.

Relationship Breakup: Why You Need to Move on and Get Over it

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When your ex is not ready to continue in the relationship the best thing for you is to move on. But it is easier said than done. If you have been really in love with somebody then how can you just move on and forget everything. If you are able to get over it then it really means that you were never in love with that person.

Most of the ‘experts’ in human relationship would ask you to get over the situation as soon as possible. You would find the same message in the related books as well. For people it is a lot easier to suppress your feelings then actually facing them. If you are able to understand and comprehend your emotions then it would result in a better state. If you can realize your mistakes in the relationship then it would ease your situation.

Life teaches lesson in every phase. So it is our responsibility to face every part of life in a very positive way. If somebody moved out of your life then it means that life wants to show you it is another face. And whose sad life is easy? Never disregard anybody if you have been in any kind of relationship. Please think that how would you feel when somebody disregards you. People react in a very different way in such situations. Some just prefer to remain silent and some become very violent. Some even go to the extent of lying to the person with whom once you were in love. But the real person is the one who would take a stand and will take it as learning out of life. It makes sense to teach the other person that what you all have learnt out of all this.

In a social life, people tend to make images of the people in their lives. What kind of image do you want to hold in other’s eyes? I think at least we would like to have a vibrant image. So that everybody can remember with good feelings after the breakup or separation. Sometimes life teaches you lessons in hard way. You need to end relationships in a friendly way.

It also depends upon the different roles that you need to play in your life. And all of these different roles have different emotions attached to them. The same is the case with your ex. He/she also has a lot of responsibilities to take care of in different relationships. And he/she would be taking the image in the way you would present her/him. The best thing to do in such situations is to be honest. In any relationship we should try to inspire each other’s spirits for a healthy living.

This life is full of ups and downs and it is a journey which makes you learn so many things which is an ongoing process. You should not let your relationship breakup get into the situation where it becomes difficult for you to look deep inside into your soul. Don’t let fear of the unknown take over your soul. You need to move on from here and live your life better.

Getting over your ex is your best solution to stop struggling with memories of your ex and move on with your life. You won’t want to miss this information to learn how to get over your breakup fast.

How To Save A Relationship – 5 Steps To Solving Relationship Problems

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Dan’s a workaholic. He loves what he does and will regularly work ten or twelve hour days. Because he’s so often absent, Lisa feels he isn’t there for her. Lisa, on the other hand, invests all her time in meeting the needs of their children. This leaves Dan feeling that she doesn’t have time for him.

Can this relationship be saved?

Should it be saved?

Here are the steps to take to save a relationship in turmoil.

Step One - decide if the relationship is worth saving. Almost any relationship can be saved. However, the process can be a rough road to travel and if both parties aren’t dedicated to making it work, there’s little likelihood of success. If you’re concerned about how to save a relationship, first make sure both parties are committed to saving it.

Step Two – pinpoint the problem in the relationship. Solving relationship problems isn’t always as easy as it sounds. Often, problems are masked by symptoms. For example, an affair is often viewed as the problem in a relationship when it’s actually a symptom hiding a much deeper problem. It may be that there’s a lack of intimacy in the relationship. It may be that there’s a lack of trust, or an addiction to porn or an addiction to sex. The affair is the result of an underlying core issue.

So it’s important to uncover the core issue (or issues) of the trouble in order to save the relationship.

Step Three – be open. Once you’ve identified the primary issues, it’s time to express your feelings and listen to your partner’s concerns. This can be a difficult process, but it can also be a rewarding process. Let your partner know how committed you are to reconnecting by holding your partner’s hand during this process.

There will be times when you’ll hear words that hurt. Remember that you and your partner aren’t trying to hurt each other. This is your opportunity to truly understand the depth of the problems that exist in the relationship and how they impact each of you. And this should be done with the sole purpose of saving the relationship.

Step Four – create an action plan. Once there’s a clear understanding between you and your partner of the core issues within the relationship, it’s time to decide how to deal with them. Work together to determine the steps each of you will take to correct the situation.

Step Five – follow through. An action plan will solve nothing unless you follow through. If you haven’t been spending enough time together, and your plan calls for a date night every week … set a night and keep that date no matter what. Short of an emergency, there should be no exceptions. If a lack of communication is a problem and you’ve decided to spend twenty minutes before bed talking … follow through.

Finally, understand that saving a relationship is an ongoing process. It doesn’t happen overnight. Solving relationship problems requires the complete commitment of both parties, and it can be a rough road with plenty of ups and downs. But isn’t spending your life with the one you love worth it?

Discover more great tips on saving a relationship after a breakup: Getting Back Together and Getting My Ex Back

How to Feel More Confident in Your Relationship

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Sayara
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In some relationships, the man dominates with all his force. You might not realize it because you’re trapped under his control but he is using very subtle manipulation techniques that even he doesn’t know he’s doing. It is a natural way of life for him because it’s what he learned from his father. You’re going to learn how to spot these manipulations and use them to your advantage to gain more confidence in your relationship.

Notice first if he is always trying to keep you from seeing a friend that does not like him. This is part of his insecurities. He automatically assumes she is constantly talking poorly about him even though you’re talking about different subjects. He will not let you see her or talk with you.

You have to calm his fears and make him feel like he should be more confident. Ask him why he acts like that around your friend. Most men are not willing to speak their minds or talk about their feelings but you have to open him up. If he never reveals the way he feels your situation will never improve. Although men do not offer their feelings, they still have them and they effect them even if nobody is aware.

If he keeps you from doing anything you like, such as a hobby, you need to change this. Your hobbies, crafts, and passions are what give you life. If he does not allow it you will become a boring, depressed person with nothing to talk about.

It is at the later stages of life when this will truly hurt you. He is keeping you from doing what you love because he wants to keep you for himself. He doesn’t want you doing things he doesn’t know anything about like ice skating, playing an instrument in a band or orchestra, or some other different endeavor.

You have to become more confident by realizing he is no more confident than you. Unfortunately, he has no reason to feel that way. You on the other hand are being negatively effected by his actions.

To make changes you have to open communications. If you are afraid he’s going to get angry or leave, the relationship is not strong enough to withstand the test of time. Children in this kind of relationship will not grow up in an unhealthy environment.

Finally, I want you to take the time to learn different strategies to open up communications and improve the relationship. If you are doing everything in your power to understand why he acts the way he does then you can feel confident that you are a good person.

For more tips and strategies please visit http://relationship-improvement.net You are a good person and you deserve a relationship where the man offers you love, holds you when your upset, and takes care of you when your sick. This is the type of relationship you deserve. A man that cares for you and loves you is all you need: Feel More Confident in Your Relationship

Better Relationship – 6 Essential Tips For Creating Beautiful Relationships

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You might be surprised, but it is not your appearance, your wealth, your great job or your fortune that is responsible for a wonderful and everlasting relationship. The key to it lies in your way of thinking. Here are six crucial tips for creating beautiful relationships:

1. A relationship is not a contest or a race! A healthy relationship is about playing in the same team. It is pointless trying to outscore your partner. Of course, you might be the MVP – most valuable player – today or another day. However, you will be all alone, without the support of your “teammate” if you keep doing this, and you will end up racing just against you. Stop this race of yours, be a real team player and try to win the game as a member of the triumphing team!

2. Be open, learn to hear, see and interact. I really enjoy sitting down and having a relaxing chit chat with my partner. We are discussing major issues as well as minor things, sharing our thoughts and ideas when we are interacting with each other. We do not punish each other with silence, and we are certainly not ending a day with being angry. For a strong relationship, learn to have genuine discussions with your partner.

3. Be aware that a relationship is not about owning your partner. This is most likely the most frequently encountered problem. The things that can really damage a relationship are jealousy and over-protectiveness. Get rid of these feelings – if you have them – or your relationship will not have a happy ending.

4. Paying attention to yourself should be one of your top priorities. The kind of relationship you have with yourself is a crucial one. You have to look after your appearance and your mind every single day. I am talking about self-esteem. If you fail to properly take care of you, the others will neglect you as well. Since you have already proven that you have no confidence in yourself, then who I am to challenge that? Begin with looking after yourself and through this you will have the necessary strength and energy to look after those who you care so much about.

5. Bring back the romance. Being romantic sends the following message: “You are my primary concern, I care deeply about you and your feelings and desires, and I want everything to be perfect for us”. You are also sending a message about you being confident. You might be surprised, but the appreciation that you will get for being romantic can be a much higher motivation and incentive than the pleasure and joy that it brings. Be an expert in romance and I can guarantee that it will add color to your life.

6. Learn to accept compromises, but not always and for everything. Relationships are based on finding the middle ground. It is alright to meet halfway every now and then, that is how life is. Just do not over-do it. Do not always be the one making all the compromises as this will break you in pieces and destroy your self-esteem. Find the balance when to give and when to take, as well as when to just abandon the ship.

John Glover has been helping couples to improve their relationship for many years. On his website http://blog.adviceforrelationship.com he is offering many helpful love and relationship tips. If you want to save your relationship and win back your love, then enroll in John’s free 10 day relationship-saving course today at http://www.adviceforrelationship.com

How to Make My Boyfriend Love Me Again – 3 Signs Your Relationship is in Trouble

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If you think your boyfriend is drifting away from you, the good news is you can learn how to make him fall back in love with you. By learning how to make my boyfriend love me again, you can keep your relationship together, even if it looks hopeless. Keeping the relationship together is not hopeless even if feelings have changed because at one point he loved you very much, all you have to do is show him how he used to feel.

One thing that you need to keep in mind is that no matter what type of relationship it is things change over time. This means that even if your boyfriend isn’t fawning all over you like he used to do that does not mean he no longer loves you. Before you spend time learning how to make my boyfriend love me again, you need to determine if your relationship is really in trouble.

One of the first signs that your relationship is in trouble is that your boyfriend rarely kisses you anymore. This is different from the kissing not being the same as it was in the beginning because that just means the relationship has changed, so if he is still kissing you all of the time there is no need to be worried. If there is little to no kissing, something is going on, he is emotionally detaching from you, and you need to take action.

The second sign to look for, is your boyfriend going out with his friends more than he normally does. It is always good for a guy to go out and do things with his buddies and as he gets more secure in his relationship with you, he will start spending a bit more time with his friends than he used to. Where you want to be considered is if he is coming up with excuses to avoid spending time with you, meaning he is going out just about every night with his friends and not getting home until the late hours of the morning. This type of behavior is a big sign that he wants his freedom back.

The third sign that something is wrong is that he is picking fights with you about the silliest things, such as who took out the garbage or something else just as trivial. Starting fights over mundane things usually means that there are deeper problems and resentments. Men have a harder time talking about these so they act out instead.

How you deal with the situation in the early stages is very important if you’re asking yourself  “how to make my boyfriend love me again?” To really find out how to proceed please come to our website and check out a superb resource that is dedicated to helping people with broken relationships just like you.

You can get immediate access to the help and advice you need at: http://www.how-to-get-back-an-ex.info

Article Source: ArticleSpan

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About Jealousy in Relationships and Dating

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Many people experience forms of jealousy throughout their life. It can begin at a young age with siblings and parents, competition at school and after moving its’ way through friends and other important figures finally finds the place where it often does the most damage: romance. Jealousy is a particularly tricky aspect of relationships because it is often said that a small amount can be healthy, while too much is destructive.

To understand why people feel jealous it is important to know what these feelings often stem from. Insecurity and low self-esteem are often culprits and certainly a bad experience or past trauma can be an excellent source. Though often obvious this emotion is capable of coming out in ways that are subtle and difficult to pinpoint at times which can be extremely frustrating for all involved.

Some of the most common outward displays of jealousy may not immediately make others, or the person experiencing these emotions aware that it is in fact the true problem:

* Anger: A secondary emotion and probably the one most commonly linked with jealousy, anger is a nasty side effect of this emotion and can do great damage to a relationship.

* Irritability: This feeling’s cause can be difficult to identify, but can easily be caused by jealousy.

* Irrational Behavior: Often felt and acted upon in situations where a person is feeling jealous but cannot remove themselves from the source or may be seeking a way to strike at the source. This can also manifest as a coping mechanism when one is near the source causing the feelings of jealousy.

* Sadness: Another secondary emotion that when caused by jealousy is usually felt when one feels at a loss for a solution to the original problem. Often accompanies a feeling of defeat or loss for the object of jealousy.

* Unreasonable: If one is having great deal difficulty in identifying their jealousy or getting it under control they may speak or act in ways that are contrary to their normal behavior.

If the person who is experiencing jealous feelings is capable of escaping those feelings when not in the presence of anything that may remind them some relief may be experienced. Understanding that many things can be linked to those feelings of jealousy is also very important as any reminder can cause a great deal of frustration:

* People: The most obvious place to begin looking is when certain uncomfortable feelings arise when in the presence of a particular person, or anything that reminds you of that person. If the feelings of jealousy are strong enough, even introducing that person’s name into the conversation can cause them to feel uneasy.

* Places: Negative emotions that arise when near, or in a specific place that remind you of something, or someone that you are jealous of can be overwhelming. If the place in question is one where something took place that caused you to feel unhappy these feeling may arise, even when you love places that have been tainted your adoration may not be able to overcome your negative feelings.

* Objects: An object that is symbolic of something that hurt you may cause you to feel jealous and unhappy because it reminds you of something that causes you pain. If the memory attached to the object is particularly strong the association can last for years.

* Music: Because music invokes such powerful emotions from the majority of the population it can be a painful reminder of jealous feelings. Any piece of music that one may associate with someone or something that causes them to feel jealousy may be very difficult to listen to.

* Images: From paintings to films the images that remind one of their jealous feelings can cause many of the secondary emotions to rise up such as anger or sadness.

It is important to identify the original event(s) that may have led to a later feeling of jealousy when reminded of them. Pinpointing the specific reasons for these emotions may help one work through such emotions and eliminate any need to feel jealousy, though this may take some time and possible the aid of a professional therapist if the emotions are too strong. Beginning with some basic questions about how you feel about your jealousy may be an excellent place to start; some of the following questions may help you to explore the causes of your feelings:

* When did you first feel jealous and of who/what?

* What did this feeling make you think of? Anything in your past?

* Are there other people/objects/places that seem to cause the same kinds of feelings?

* Why do you think that you are experiencing these feelings?

* Who or what do you feel angry with?

* When you feel this jealousy, how do you want to act on it?

* Do you feel that your reactions are unreasonable when you’re calm again?

* Do you feel out of control when you become jealous?

* Have you stopped normal behavior, going places you would normally or doing things that you love to do in order to avoid these feelings?

Conquering jealousy can be very difficult depending upon the source and intensity of the feeling. Be assured that though a little jealousy can be endearing, too much is often a great way to destroy a relationship. In many cases the real problem with jealousy in relationships has a lot to do with trust; if a person is unable to trust their partner they may find that they are frequently suspicious of their partner’s actions.

Only you and the person you love can draw conclusions about what level of jealousy is acceptable and what may be hurting your relationship, or either of you personally. Remember that treating your partner as though they aren’t deserving of your trust, when they have taken no action to cause it, will often lead to a breakup.

One excellent rule to follow if one is feeling particularly jealous in a romantic relationship is to keep in mind that without trust between you and your partner your relationship has a good chance of ending, so either find a way to trust or figure out why it is that you are unable to.

In the end the green eyed monster often gets the best of most people from time to time; try to minimize the frustration caused by jealousy and you will be likely to enjoy a far greater relationship with any friend, relative or lover in your life.

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Marriage Counseling Can Help To Improve Relationships

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At the foundation of any marriage and family is a core relationship. Relationships can be difficult for many people – particularly when they are not comfortable communicating their feelings, when they feel unsettled when others are upset with them and when there are kids involved.

For them, when there are challenges in the marriage, marriage counseling is often the most effective way of recognizing and working through the difficulties.

With marriage counseling, both spouses are able to sit down, to talk and to have the chance to be heard. Therapists who specialize in marriage counseling will be there to facilitate the conversation, to ask questions, to encourage active listening and to help both spouses to more comfortably express the hurt, anger or frustration that they are experiencing.

Unfortunately, the emotional toll of a conversation or an event can be particularly high. Within relationships, the emotional strain is something that can build over time – especially when both parties involved have trouble discussing the way that they feel or the event that prompted the response.

In marriage counseling, however, many couples find that they are in a better position to open up and – more importantly – to feel heard by their spouse. While it can be uncomfortable to start talking, while hearing the details of what hurt a husband or a wife and while it can be difficult to talk about emotions or situations that are painful, having those conversations in the setting of marriage counseling can ease some of the strain.

Marriage counseling, while it can dramatically improve relationships, is not just a matter of meeting with someone who will “fix” the problem; marriage counseling is a process of improving communication and ultimately of uncovering past hurts so that they can be worked through.

Despite the fact that these hurts have often been buried, despite the fact that sometimes the event that has caused the hurt may be long in the past, marriage counseling can serve to uncover the underlying issues and to work on rebuilding communication and trust as well as a strong foundation for moving the relationship forward.

In part, the reason that marriage counseling works in many relationships is simple: marriage counseling works because it helps couples to acknowledge the hurts and frustrations, to work through the anger and to communicate with one another. In part, marriage counseling works simply because it enables both parties to express themselves and to feel heard by one another.

Communication is often difficult – especially when both parties either believe that they are in the right or there is a sense of not wanting to hurt the other person in any way. In marriages, a lack of communication can have a number of negative effects on the relationship; marriage counseling can serve to repair the damage and to reopen the lines of communication.

With marriage counseling, what many couples discover is that the biggest problem that they have faced is a lack of communication that has led to a lack of trust. What they learn during marriage counseling is the ability to communicate – something that, over time, allows them to improve the relationship on the whole.

For more information on counseling for couples, individuals, marriage and relationships, or live phone counseling, visit The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory.

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Danger – These 10 Mistakes Can Kill Your Relationship

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No relationship is perfect. However, there are several serious pitfalls that will end a relationship very quickly if you don’t try to avoid them. The 10 items below are some of the most common and serious mistakes than can keep you from having the lasting relationship you want.

  1. Cheating. Being unfaithful is the number one way to end a relationship. If you want to see someone else, be responsible enough to end your relationship first. Anything else is just being dishonest and cowardly.
  2. Hanging on to Your Ex. While it’s very important to remember your past mistakes, it’s also important to move on. If you’re still hung up on your ex, perhaps it’s too early to start a new relationship. Even when you think you have no feelings left, if you’re stuck in a pattern of bringing up your ex all the time when you talk with your new partner, you should do some serious thinking about where you’ve been and where you’re heading. Your current partner deserves your full attention. It’s only fair.
  3. Rushing Things. Relationships develop at their own pace. Some move quickly, others move slowly and steadily. If you push your partner too much, you risk pushing them away. Two prime examples of this are the timing of physical intimacy and saying “I love you.” Both of these things are best when they happen naturally. You’ll both know when the time is right and the relationship won’t be strained.
  4. Being Ruled by Jealousy. Often feelings of intense jealousy are caused by past relationships. If your partner is open and honest, you shouldn’t feel threatened by incidental contact with someone else. Conversation and interaction is normal. Trust is also important. If you become jealous with your partner without real cause, it can seriously harm your relationship.
  5. Focusing too Much on the Future. When relationships are new, it’s not the time to dwell too much on the future. Live for the day. The flush of excitement of a new relationship only happens once. Instead of worrying about what’s coming next, enjoy what you have now. Often when one partner is too concerned about the future, the other partner is scared away thinking that they are too serious. Again, live for the moment and enjoy where you are.
  6. Failure to Balance Friendships With the Relationship. It’s important for each of you to have friends. People often take things very personally when someone talks badly about a friend. Because of these two things, it’s critical to allow your partner time with and for their friends while avoiding talking badly about them. No one is perfect – most of our friends have quirks. Just remember that your friends can be a little strange, too. Finally, don’t feel threatened when your partner wants to do something with their friends.
  7. Failure to Communicate. Open honest communication is one of the most important things in a healthy relationship. When you keep secrets or even feel too embarrassed to discuss your thoughts, it can build walls between you and your partner. Yes, there is a risk that your feelings or thoughts might end up causing problems in the relationship. However, if there’s a break-up because you’re not compatible, that’s OK. In fact it’s far better to find that out than to pretend you’re something you’re not.
  8. Forcing your Partner to Change. This is the flip-side of #7. If you can’t accept who your partner is, you probably should find someone else. When you force your partner to change, there is often resentment and the changes rarely last. Even when a partner has a real problem, we can’t “fix” them. We can encourage, but if they don’t commit to the change on their own, it just won’t happen.
  9. Blaming Your Partner. A relationship takes two people. So do relationship problems. It can be very difficult and often painful to admit our part in relationship problems, but an honest look at our actions is critical. If you expect your partner to face the blame for a problem all alone, don’t be surprised when they don’t want to do anything else with your either.
  10. Staying After the Feeling is Gone. If you’re just going through the motions in a relationship, your partner knows it. If the relationship is worth saving, you both need to talk and find a way to reignite the spark If not, you should be honest enough to admit that the relationship is over. Often we’re stuck in these ruts because the uncomfortable “known” seems better than the scary “unknown.” In reality, a flat relationship will not last, and will often lead to serious conflict.

Doug has been writing articles for nearly 4 years. Come visit his latest website over at daletiffanylamp.org which helps people find the Tiffany Style Table Lamps they are looking for.

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