Dating Tips & Relationship Advice
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Dating Tips & Relationship Advice

What every wife fears more than a mistress is one who just doesn’t know when to quit. Though few are as determined as the one in ‘Fatal Attraction’, it can still be stressful when to a wife who is struggling to save her marriage and an unscrupulous competitor is hovering nearby. Here are some useful hints to help you save the situation.

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When Your Husband’s Mistress Won’t Back Off

By Katie Lersch

I recently received an email from a wife who was at her wit’s end with her husband’s former mistress. The husband was insisting that he was now committed to the wife and the marriage and they were working very hard to save the marriage. However, the mistress just seemed unwilling to let the husband go. She would drive by the house, continue to call both the wife and husband and hang up, send emails, and send messages on their face book accounts.

They wanted to get rid of this woman once and for all but she didn’t seem to be getting the message. The wife wanted to my advice as to how to get the mistress to back off so that she could get her life back and get to work on saving her marriage. She just wanted to be left alone. I’ll tell you what I told her in the following article.

Telling The Mistress Very Plainly To Back Off And Then Not Responding To Her Again: It’s not always the case, but sometimes the mistress hangs on because the husband has not made himself crystal clear. Of course, he will tell the wife that he’s been very direct. But, the mistress might see things a bit differently. She may take little nuggets of what your husband is saying and turn them around so that they are saying exactly what she wants him to say.

In this case, it’s best to make sure that the husband is very clear in one last message. I often advise that the wife listens in on the phone call, which should be very short. Basically, I felt that the husband should pick up the next time the mistress called and tell her that she was not to contact, follow, drive by, or attempt to engage either him or his wife. If the mistress tried to interrupt, the husband was just to respond that if she continued on, they would have to take legal action and that this was the last time the two of them would communicate. The husband was then to hang up and to not engage with her no matter what.

Once The Message Has Been Delivered, Refuse To Engage With The Mistress: Sometimes, this firm message won’t be enough to get the mistress to back off. She will often try to test this to see if the husband really meant what he said. But here’s the thing, the more you engage with her and the more she makes you angry and frustrated, the more she thinks that she has won. Her whole goal is to make you and your husband place your focus on her rather than each other. Do not let her do this.

Block her number and her texts on your phone. Block her email. Tell your provider that she is spam. Ignore her completely if you can. Pretend that she doesn’t exist. Every time you respond to her and engage her, she just makes this process go on for much longer than it should. Eventually, she will get the message that you have moved on and that you have left no place for her in your life. She will usually eventually turn her attention elsewhere since she is no longer getting the pay off that she feeds off of.

Leave Any Actions That Are Necessary To The Professionals: Never fight with the mistress. Never allow her to bait you into an altercation. I’ve had readers who have had no choice but to send the mistress a certified letter and to tell her that if she continues on, they will get a restraining order. (You want this in writing so you have a paper trail that you have done nothing wrong and have tried to address this.)

Whatever you do, don’t stoop down to her level. Don’t let her win. If she just will not stop, you may have to involve the authorities. That is their job. Let them do it. But, the more that you allow for her to carry on like this, the more she feeds on the process. Her greatest fear is that the two of you move on together and have no place for her in your life anymore. Her “not backing off” is her attempt to weasel her way back in.

But you have control over how you react to her. The best course of action is often to make your position (and your husband’s) crystal clear and then to pull out of the game knowing that she will eventually get the message. If she doesn’t, then leave this to the professionals. Do not try to deal with her yourself. The less you allow her into your life, the better off you are.

I know that even contemplating your husband’s mistress is painful and difficult, but make sure that you don’t give her more power than she deserves. And, healing is often closer than you may think. It took a lot of work and patience, but today my marriage is actually stronger than it ever was before. I also did a lot of work on myself and am happier as the result. Our bond and intimacy is much stronger and my self esteem is at an all time high. I no longer worry my husband will cheat again. You can read a very personal story on my blog at http://surviving-the-affair.com/

Who/what is the best marriage advice you have gotten?

*Or what experience has influenced you the most for a better marriage

One of the most pressing needs that a woman can have is knowing How You Can Fix a Marriage After an Affair. Confused, disturbed and at a loss to know what to do next, it can help to receive advice from one who’s been there – and gotten past it. Check out this article and be sure to add your advice so we can all appreciate your comments:

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Can You Fix a Marriage After an Emotional Affair? – What You Don’t Know Could Surely Hurt You!

By Jason T. Nelson

So you caught your partner having an emotional affair… what happens next?

You’re probably very confused with the discovery that your spouse has been cheating behind your back, even if only in an emotional affair… it still hurts.

The pain, the disappointment, is seemingly impossible to bear. Again, the question is, what do you do? And more importantly, how do you cope?

What It Feels Like to Find Out Your Spouse Is Having an Emotional Affair

Everything may seem all wrong after you discover your partner cheating on you. Believe me. I know it’s hard because I have once been through, or the victim of an emotional affair as well.

The relationship that my wife got involved in was an emotional one, which, in my book, is just as bad in some ways as if it had been a physical one. I was torn apart by the revelation that the woman I love most had done something to betray me. I didn’t know at that time how to fix our marriage or if we could ever go back to the way we once were.

I thought about things thoroughly and finally, I came to the conclusion that my love for my wife and the commitment that I put into our marriage was something that outweighed my discovery of her emotional affair. That was when I decided to accept and forgive at the same time.

It was really difficult on my part to accept the fact that I was cheated on. Every so often, the feelings of hurt and betrayal would surface and would engulf me in misery. I tried to overcome all of these by being more objective.

How I Began to Save My Marriage

I tried to understand what had happened in our marriage to push my wife to do such a thing. I read books and online materials about coping after you’ve caught your spouse having an emotional affair.

I tried to see clearly and not to screw up my focus with my personal feelings of hurt and helplessness. As I dug deeper into the issue, I started to realize that my wife was not the only one at fault. In fact, I think I had an important role that led her to do such a thing. I was the one who drove her away by ignoring many of her needs.

This realization helped me to have a more in-depth understanding of my relationship with my wife and how I should fix it. I really wanted to go back to how we had been, so I decided to push the past behind us. There was irrevocable damage in our relationship but should it drive us apart? I didn’t want it to, so I made an effort to forget and to move on.

Why Saving a Marriage After an Emotional Affair Isn’t Easy

Biting the bullet and moving on may sound easy, but I’m telling you, it’s not. There were even many times when I wanted to seek revenge by cheating on her as well by finding my own person to have an emotional affair with.

Other times, the feelings of pain would creep back in and it felt as if I really hated her for hurting me.

But all of that is behind us now for the most part. I have changed for the better and so has she. We have a deeper relationship now and our marriage has become stronger because of what we were able to overcome as a couple. Indeed, there is hope after an emotional affair.

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What Men Really Want in Bed – No Dead Fish For Starters

So what do men really want in bed? Do you know what turns men on in general? More importantly, do you know what turns ‘your’ man on? If you want to pick up a few tips, then read on…

Okay, the first thing to ask yourself is, are you ‘both’ as happy today – in the bedroom department – as you were when you first met? Remember way back when (whether it was months or years even), when you were both excited just to be together, couldn’t get enough of each other sexually and really got turned on by each other. You just both wanted to touch each other all the time, in bed and out and oftentimes used to rip each others clothes off – remember that? Or is it something like a distant memory?

If you find yourselves ‘making out’ less than you used to, then that’s okay. In fact it’s absolutely normal. With the passage of time, how often you jump on each other is usually going to drop to a less explosive degree: let’s say you used to make out every single night (sometimes more than once!) and now you make love say three times a week (the average for a normal relationship), whether you’re married or not.

What is ‘not’ okay is if you went from having a wonderfully exciting and ‘active’ sex life to now having ‘it’ say once a month. This is ‘not’ good.

So what do men really want in bed?

Firstly, he wants sex. And he wants it more than once a month. As outlined above, think back to when you first met. Okay, you might not be able to manage the marathon sessions today (perhaps you have kids now) but you absolutely have to make an effort. So first thing, he wants sex, it’s that simple. If you’re not making out at least once a week, preferably a minimum of three, then you need to find the time and spend time with your man sexually.

Secondly and ‘just as important’, he wants you to enjoy your lovemaking. So many times guys (in confidence with therapists) will say they feel their wives or partners are like ‘dead fish’. He wants some feeling, some expression from you, that you’re actually ‘there’ with him.

He doesn’t want to be thinking, ‘Oh God, she just wants me to get this over and done with’ or ‘I know she doesn’t want this but I’m desperate, we haven’t done it for weeks’. Guys actually experience this and it’s sad and outrageous at the same time. So in case you missed the point, men hate ‘dead fish’ in the sack!

He has every right to feel neglected, upset, used and more if the two of you had a wonderful physical relationship at the outset and now you could care less whether you make out or not. It’s not right and it’s not fair, to either one of you.

Lastly, he wants you to make an effort with your appearance. Again, go back to when you first met. You probably brushed your hair, spritzed some perfume on and even sometimes wore sexy lingerie. Well, give him a treat today. Does he no longer deserve type of attention from you?

Just because you may have now been together for a while, take it from me, your man needs to be satisfied in bed. If he’s not, he will (vast majority of men that is and I don’t care what personality trait he has) start noticing other women as he’s painfully aware of what he no longer gets at home.

So do yourself a favor (and your guy), take him back to when you first met. Give him what he wants in bed. Remember, he wants (1) sex, (2) no dead fish and (3) make an effort.

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Being able to take the next step when you know he’s ready to marry you can seem more distant than you would like -  if you’re uncertain about what he intends. Many women would feel more comfortable if they knew where their relationship was heading. Be sure to look closely at this article and don’t forget to add your advice so we can all appreciate your comments:

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Telltale Signs That He’s Ready to Marry You – Relationship Tips For Women

Wouldn’t life be much easier if men just came right out and said what they were thinking and feeling? They often do but when it comes to relationships, many men just don’t wear their hearts on their sleeves.

If you’re in a dating relationship that you’d like to see turn into a marital relationship, you’re obviously going to want your man to feel the same way. If he’s not sharing openly what he’s feeling, there’s still a way for you to tell. There are several signs that he’s ready to marry you that will help you see where exactly he is at in terms of a more serious commitment.

One of the most obvious signs that he’s ready to marry you is that he starts talking about the future in terms of you two as a couple as opposed him by himself. Consider how often he says things like “we” or “us” and how many times a day he’s using the words “me” or “I”. When a man is marriage minded he starts talking about the two of you as a couple.

He may say things about what you two will be doing years from now or the children you two will have together. A man who wants to get married starts to think that way.

If he suddenly seems more concerned with money matters that’s a plus for you. One of the signs that he’s ready to marry you is that he’ll want to provide for you and the future family you two will be raising. If a man becomes obsessed with retirement savings, and mortgage rates, he’s got a more serious commitment in mind. Men who are still thinking about being single tend to worry more about what they can buy in the moment versus how they can best spend their money to help you two as a couple.

There are specific things that any woman can say and do that will make her men want to commit to her. If you believe that he is the man you are destined to be with there are things you can do right now that will make him feel exactly the same way about you.

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How to Make Them Fall in Love With You

So how do you get  him to fall in love with you? Is there a magical secret to win anyone’s heart to your favor? Maybe there is one special thing that can make a person fall in love with you, and all you have to do is that one thing. Could it be a special scent you can buy from the department store and spray on you, a pheromone or something similar to make anyone weak to your powers? Well, yes and no. There is a simple way to make someone fall in love with you. It may take some work on your part, but it is very simple.

When we are single and trying to attract others into our lives, we go all out to look the best we can, we work out like maniacs to get that perfect body. Our clothes are the latest styles, and have heavy price tags. We grab the attention of others and maybe date a few times then move on to the next person.

There we are again and again in the same place we were when we started and the cycle begins again. So what happened during our bonding process to make one or both of us run for the hills and back into the single world?

The first date, we are the perfect gentleman or lady being careful with what we say and do. Men are opening the doors for the women and being on their best behavior. The women are ladies, listening intently to the conversation keeping eye contact so he knows she is interested.

The date ends with a kiss and both parties are anxious to meet again, going over the night in their heads smiling and content they have the beginning of something wonderful. The second date the charm is flying from both ends. Everyone is happy and things seem to go very well.

Next thing we know you are several months or years into this relationship, and you wonder why you keep trying to keep things going. Maybe you aren’t even trying anymore, and instead you are waiting for the perfect opportunity to get out and on with your life. How did it get from date one to this point again? Why do we keep attracting those losers? If we take a look at how we progressed through the courting period of our relationships, we might find the answer.

Let’s go back to the original question. How do you get someone to fall in love with you? This is the easy part. The answer is by being you from the beginning. If you are acting in a manner that is not consistent to whom you are, then how can you expect them to fall in love with you. The best case scenario in this situation is they fall in love with the person you are pretending to be.

This is when we end up in the scenario of the proverbial squirrel cage. Starting and ending relationships never finding happiness with our partners or dare I say us. If we are true to ourselves, we will attract those who want to be with us. If we are attracting people who want to be with someone like us, then eventually we end up with someone who loves you. And now we have a relationship that can last and have meaning and substance, aka a healthy relationship.

If for some reason we don’t like who we truly are, then we can’t expect anyone else to like us can we? Now we get to the hard part. One of the hardest things anyone can do is to take a look inside us and point out the things we don’t like or don’t respect about ourselves. Most people already know what they do and don’t like about themselves, but keep the bad locked away.

The beautiful thing is we can change the bad things. It is going to take effort and honesty, but anyone can change. In fact, the only thing we can change in life is ourselves and how we react to outside stimulus.

The reason we don’t change is because it is much easier to not change. But if we choose to be the person we want to be, and we work towards being that person, we grow and mature. When we grow and mature we become a better person and we begin to like ourselves for who we are.

If we like who we are, we will be ourselves around other people, and begin to attract those who are capable and want to love someone like us. Then, and only then, do we have a chance to build a healthy, loving, rewarding, and long lasting relationship.

Guy Russell is the creator of the new website Romantic Tips | Relationship Advice. This site is a community based site where romantically inclined or romantically challenged people can get and share information, tips, and stories. Happy reading.

Relationship expert Young Jack Thriller gives his advice to a woman going through domestic violence. SUBSCRIBE RATE COMMENT- JOIN OUR FACEBOOK PAGE YOUNGJACKTHRILLER-twitter@jackthriller For Bookings youngjackthriller@gmail.com or call 718 260 3289

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Free Marriage Advice

Marriages are made in heaven, but, unfortunately couples have to lead their marriages on this mortal Earth! Though hundreds of experts provide free marriage advice of all sorts, no one has the real courage to say that marriage has to be proved right here on the soil!

Marriage is a holy process, that binds two people close together and it also mandates that both should be honest and faithful to each other for the rest of their life. But, it never turns out this way! Marriages happen overnight and break the next day, due to several reasons and factors that are unique and individual to each couple. To make your marriage stable and lively, listed here are some free marriage advice and tips, using which you can ensure that most of the problems that affect a marriage, are kept at a safe distance:

• Speak only those words that are kind and honest! Words can make or break a relationship! Beware how you speak your words! Many marriages break just as a result of bitter quarrels that engage foul words and unkind remarks. Free marriage advice is never complete, without stressing on the importance of using good and kind words in the daily life!

• Never ever, offend your husband’s ego with caustic remarks. On the other hand, do not attempt to hurt the self esteem of your wife. Both are equally dangerous and risky! Be kind to each other and respect other’s strengths and weaknesses.

• Love your wife honestly and sincerely, and never deceive her with wrong pretensions! Cheating on your wife is very dangerous and risky. Same thing applies to those lovely wives also! Be truthful to each other and maintain this honest relationship for the rest of your lives. Free marriage advice could not be better than this, as adultery and cheating are considered, as the two of most hated words in a marriage,

• Surprise your spouse with a special, surprising gift at least some times in a year. Gift something that is useful and close to each other’s heart. Let the gift revoke the previous good memories of your marriage.

• Free marriage advice counselors agree that marriage is a give and take process that involves couple’s active participation and help. Make sure that you understand each other’s needs completely and act according to what is agreed between you and your spouse.

• Ego and jealously are two bad things that can bring sadness to your married life. If you’re a selfish person or if you feel jealous of your spouse’s achievements, you’re on your way to spoil your own married life. Control these bad habits, as far as possible and let your spouse know that you’re proud of his/her achievements and deeds.

Free marriage advice comes in many forms and types; however you will need to be very cautious, while soliciting such advice from people. Just know that there are many people, who may provide you the wrong information.

Free marriage advice is available from marriage counselors, marriage bureaus, church and community forums. You may also need to take the best piece of free marriage advice and suggestions for your marriage and leave the rest aside.

Please visit my website www.maryshawe.com to browse the resources I have gathered here for you and learn how they hold the secrets to turn your life around.If you’re particularly interested in marriage advice and counseling, then please click here to read more about “Secrets of Successful Marriage”.

Many people want more info about Dating Relationship Advice, so have a look at this. One of the enjoyable tasks for this site is keeping an eye open for news, videos, articles, and other beneficial information which assists people to have more uplifting relationships. Be sure to consider it all. Don’t forget to offer your opinions so we can all enjoy your comments:

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Dating Relationship Advice – Getting Good Dating Relationship Advice

Seeking good dating relationship advice should be of paramount importance if you are one of people everyone this feels very much clueless on the dating scene. Many of us feel that we don’t need the advice of our peers, but the reality is that insert of any kind is generally helpful. Good dating relationship advice can get us on our feet and form us, possibly, additional attractive to persons we covet to a times ahead partner.

The area of relationship advice is often an overlooked area because many people feel that their relationships are so complicated that any advice given to them cannot possibly be suitable. The reality is, however, that many of the conflicts in dating relationships are similar to those in other relationships.

People tend to argue or fight about similar things and tend to create patterns. For example, many people argue about financial matters. A good case for relationship advice would counter those difficulties with conflict resolution involving fights with money.

As people enter into marriage relationships with a good background of dating relationship advice, the odds of success during inevitable marriage trials improve drastically. This is because, through their dating history, they were able to find better ways to resolve conflicts.

The possibility of using a marriage counselor, therefore, tends to diminish with the greater self-sufficiency of the couple. A marriage counselor, while helpful to people that need it, can be a costly option for people in a marriage.

Getting marriage help, for many, is the ultimate standard of helplessness. Many people equate marriage help to a last ditch effort and feel that it says that the marriage is in some sort of trouble. Getting dating relationship advice can be comparable, especially among the land of the proud.

The reality is, however, that seeking the advice of people that have “been there before” can be enlightening and can awaken fresh perspectives within relationships. Getting a new point of view out of marriage help or dating advice in any form can be a positive step to improving your relationships.

Although dating relationship advice can be helpful on many levels, it is important to remember that it is not for everyone. In our society, there are many people that tend to prefer to “go it alone” and try to solve their own problems without discussing them with family or friends. Start taking actions to Change your social life forever!

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